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Monday, December 3, 2007 3:25 AM

My secret is fatally gorgeous
I'd die for you
But when your precious life is at stake
tell me would you die for me too?

I'm a freaking night bird. But i guess it would ease the time difference when i'm in Europe next week. I've decided to start packing. I'm a really slow packer, i start early but i usually end up rushing the night before. I always bring lots of clothes (and lots of junk), because i'm awfully indecisive and i dress according to my moods, which fly left right up down. I guess winter makes things a lot easier; just pick out your favourite tee and wrap yourself in that only jacket of yours.

I've spent the last few days watching ANTM (America's next top model, cycle 9) on youtube. I love the pictures they take, they always always scream picture perfect. I've always asked myself if i would join something like that and now i'm like nah, awesome experience but being in an industry like that really stinks.

I feel like running around in a funny dress and flats tomorrow to get all the things i need for my trip, maybe, i'll pull my sister along. AND i should really stop hitting myself and bumping into everything/falling over anything because i'm getting bruises everywhere. I guess if there wasn't such a thing as pain, i'd have lost all my limbs by now.

I have to control my bladder. Correction, it's, overactive bladder. One thing i know is that it makes jan want to drag me to the doctor by my hair (ever since she saw the ad for overactive bladders like in sec3 or sth). I fear that my poor bladder control would land me in super sized diapers when i become a little old lady.

Anyway...
It's like a proper closure for me when i go overseas every year. Be it a smooth year, or one of complete madness, it pulls me away and presents the bigger picture of everything to me; when i can see my life from a distance. I'm going to turn eighteen in a couple of months and the fact that i'll be seventeen only once is suddenly getting to me now. It's like you look forward so much that you forget where you are currently at. We try so hard not to die, that sometimes we forget to appreciate life. When i'm 51, all wrinkled by years and tired by work and if someone were to ask me if i remember how it was like to be young and seventeen; i wonder if i'll answer yes, with a smile. Maybe i would. Because i kinda miss those days all the way back in primary one where random people in the canteen would go up to you and say, can i be your friend?

And, you always said yes.

A real character in the story of your now distant life


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